The Possibility of Death
by Kafira-chan
Summary: Bones comes down with an illness that is incurable and fatal. What happens when he tries to distance himself from his boyfriends? Sequel to Meld Spock/Kirk/McCoy Sorry its short. I might edit it later


I found out that happily ever after doesn't last forever. Even though I knew that there would be problems in the relationship between Spock, Jim and me I never expected this to happen. Things had been almost perfect between us since the mind-meld. Spock and Jim had started being more careful on away missions, only coming back a few times with minor injuries. I couldn't remember a time when I had been happier. Of course its just when everything is going perfect that something comes along to ruin it. Things had been going well for almost a year when I got sick.

I had been on an away mission when I first discovered something was wrong. Blood wasn't flowing to my extremities like it should and there was a reduced oxygen level in the bloodstream. I knew what it was though I ran some tests at the facility I was in to be sure. I panicked when the results came back because it was rare, there was no cure, and it was fatal. I had xenopolycythemia.

Tears filled my eyes as I looked at the test results again for the umpteenth time since discovering I was ill three weeks ago. Ever since getting back to the Enterprise I had been doing my best to distance myself from the people I cared about the most. It was easy right now since I hadn't seen Jim or Spock since finding out because I had been away on the mission and I used the excuse of being busy since being back.

I wiped the tears from my eyes, stealing myself to start my shift in the medical bay. I had been sleeping in my office since I returned to the ship to avoid Jim and Spock. I wasn't ready to face them, in fact I wasn't ready to face anyone but I couldn't avoid my responsibilities.

The medical bay was bustling as I exited my office. I took a moment to look around before walking to Nurse Chapel to get the list of admittances since my last shift. There were quite a few so I got to work helping to fix them up, throwing myself into my work to ignore my problems.

I worked non-stop for the next fourteen hours, not stopping for any reason even when Nurse Chapel insisted I should. I just waved her off and went back to work, moving from one patient to another. I didn't even notice when the end of my shift came, I just kept working.

I suppose Nurse Chapel was tired of me doing this every day for the past two weeks because when I turned around from administering a hypospray to one patient to fight off his dehydration she was there with backup. She had gotten my boyfriends.

Jim and Spock stood beside Nurse Chapel, both in their off duty clothing as they had been off for over six hours. Jim stepped forward and said in his captain's voice "Doctor McCoy, we need to speak to you in your office now." He meant business. I guess they had been in before but I just ignored them.

I wanted to ignore him and keep working because it was the only time I could forget about my illness but from the look on his face I knew that he wouldn't have it. I sighed and nodded, heading sluggishly towards my office.

Jim and Spock followed me in, closing the door behind me as I shoved my test result into my desk. I sat down on the bed I had set up in there, waiting for them to start in on me.

"What is wrong with you Bones? You are going to work yourself to death if you keep this up!" Jim yelled at me as soon as the door was closed. I flinched a little, looking down at my hands. "Dammit Bones, talk to us."

Spock came to sit next to me, lacing his fingers with mine in a Vulcan kiss that normally would have been comforting but this time it just broke my heart. I tugged my hands back and curled up a little, tears burning my eyes. Spock and Jim shared a look of concern, fear showing in Jim's eyes.

Jim came and kneeled in front of me, looking up at me concerned. "Bones? What's wrong? If you don't talk to us we can't fix it." I started to sob a little. There was no fixing this.

I looked up at them, looking between the two of them with tears burning my eyes. "There is no fixing this." I said, my voice tight with pain. "I'm breaking up with you two. Its for the best." I felt myself shutting down a little as I said those words.

Hurt flashed over both of their faces before Spock spoke up. "Why? What have we done?" I fought back harder sobs, reaching forward to touch his face before pulling my hand away.

I shook my head, wiping at my eyes. "You didn't do anything. In fact you two are the best boyfriends in the entire universe and I love you both. That is why I have to do this. I have to do this for your sake." I looked down at my hands, tears falling silently from my eyes.

Jim stood up, a look of anger on his face. "How is this for our sake?! You're breaking our hearts for our sake? How does that make sense? Please explain it to me because I don't understand." He yelled.

I flinched as he yelled at me, no longer holding back my sobs. "It's best if I don't tell you. I don't want to tell you, I want to save you from this. That's why I'm asking to transfer ships when we get back to earth." I said quietly through sobs.

Spock swore, something I never thought I'd hear him do before placing his hand on my face, initiating a mind meld. His human side was showing because he didn't ask for permission and his emotions were showing quite clearly.

I felt his fear for me, his heartbreak over me breaking up with them, his confusion, and his love for me. I felt his hand start to tremble a little when he realized why I was doing all of this, why I was cutting myself off from them. He yanked his hand away as if burned when he realized I had xenopolycythemia, his eyes filling with tears as he pulled me into a hug.

"Why didn't you tell us Leonard?" His voice cracking a little as he cried, holding me tight. Jim looked on, confusion clear on his face. "You should have told us Bones. We are here for you no matter what." He whispered into my hair before looking up at Jim. "He has xenopolycythemia Jim. It's fatal."

Jim's face converted from confusion to pure panic and sadness. I indicated his expression and muttered between my sobs. "This is why I didn't want to tell you. I wanted to save you from all the pain it will cause you when I die."

Jim clenched his fist, spinning around to punch a hole in the wall. "NO! You don't get to keep something like this to yourself! Bones, we love you, I love you so fucking much I want to spend the rest of our lives together, even if it's a week or a hundred years. Don't cut short whatever time we have left together." His voice got softer as he talked and he came to sit next to me, cradling his hand.

I looked at him, tears flowing from my eyes as I leaned against Spock before nodding tentatively. "I'm sorry." I muttered sadly.

Jim stroked my hair gently with his uninjured hand as Spock sat quietly beside me. "Its okay. I understand why you were doing it. Just don't. Be with us for whatever time you have left." I nodded before Jim leaned forward to kiss me gently. "I mean it. You are going to be with us. No more hiding here all the time, come back to our room babe."

I gave him a small smile and nodded before glancing at Spock. "You've been quiet through this all." I looked at him worriedly, scared of his reaction.

Spock looked at me seriously and kissed me gently before whispering "I will find a cure. I promise you." I felt my heart sore a little over the fact that Spock was willing to do that for me. I knew that if anyone could find a cure it would be him.

I kissed him back, leaning against his body. "Thank you so much Spock. And thank you Jim. I love you both so both so damn much." I turned and kissed Jim, pulling them both into a hug before glancing at Jim's hand. "Let me fix that for you."

After I fixed up Jim's hand he grabbed mine, pulled me up and started leading me out of the medical bay. "Time for you to get a good night sleep." I smiled lovingly at both Jim and Spock as I followed them towards our room. Even if I was going to die in less than a year I knew things were going to be okay for the time being.

Spock saved my life two weeks later by discovering a cure for xenopolycythemia. The process was excruciatingly painful and took a week to go through but it was worth it to keep living. Jim and Spock were with me the entire time, they were there for each of the cure administrations and held me as the pain racked my body afterwards.

Even with all the pain, suffering and fear that filled the months of my sickness I wouldn't trade it for time without it. It forged a even tighter bond between Jim, Spock and I. I knew after that that our love could conquer anything as tacky as that sounds.


End file.
